TL;DR: Observing luxury relationships on social media motivates ordinary people to become more successful, but it can also make them feel envious. Wealthy individuals increasingly seek validation on social media, potentially reducing a relationship based on passion and exclusivity to a performative partnership.
Luxury used to be the prerogative of a select few, defined by experience and discretion. With the rise of social media, these once-intimate connections are increasingly becoming performative partnerships. Perception of luxury has become completely and easily accessible, even though luxury itself is far from that, and the need for public validation often overshadows genuine affection.
Engaging due to a need to perform
Luxury is increasingly being measured by engagement metrics such as likes, shares, and comments. A 2024 survey found that 27.5% of luxury travelers cited unique experiences as the main reason to book a luxury tour, pointing to a desire to outperform. The value of the luxury travel market was estimated at around $1.489 trillion in 2024 and is predicted to increase by 7.9% a year on average until 2030. Surprisingly, female travelers topped the luxury list with 61.3% of the total.
The desire to showcase a luxury lifestyle often leads to performative behavior. Instead of engaging out of genuine interest, some seek association for social validation.
To an extent, this causes luxury to lose its depth, becoming a form of social currency.
Social media propagate the “seen-to-be-seen” effect, where being part of an elite relationship is as much about online recognition as it is about personal fulfillment. In this day and age, dating a lawyer will make you the envy of all your social media contacts.
Some Instagram users believe that the people who declare their underlying love on social media secretly hate each other or themselves, and this is interesting coming from them, as they clearly can’t help being privy to positive social media effects. Still, the obsession with luxury relationships remains, and the fascination with power couples (Bennifer, Kimye, Brangelina) is part of that. Social media users follow celebrities’ lives religiously and are devastated when a seemingly perfect couple splits.
Thanks to social media, ordinary people feel like they are in these celebs’ homes, watching a fairytale come to life. Famous power couples are worlds away, but there is a reason people follow them. They feel like they can relate. Celebrities and the uber-rich in general are like ordinary people, only richer and more successful. You might look up to Elon Musk if you’re an aspiring entrepreneur. Famous and successful people are versions of regular folks but living out the latter’s fantasies. Regular people live through their success, being encouraged to achieve more, perform better, etc.
The economic implications
Celebrities have a significant impact on people’s personal lives as well as their purchasing habits. Around 42% of respondents in a 2023 survey on luxury goods purchases in Hong Kong stated that celebrities influenced their purchases of luxury clothing. Findings from a UK survey of 514 consumers replicate these results, indicating that celebrity credibility is a crucial factor in decisions to buy sustainable luxury goods.
Social media has democratized luxury at an emotional and financial cost. Relationships that were once built on passion and exclusivity have been reduced to fleeting, performative partnerships. In order to grasp the true essence of luxury, people need to look beyond their devices. It takes work to foster a genuine connection, but building a relationship rooted in true appreciation rather than public perception is definitely worthwhile.
Recap
• Engagement metrics increasingly apply to luxury lifestyles and relationships
• The desire to demonstrate luxury leads to performative behavior
• Social media propagate the “seen-to-be-seen” effect